My father, not man of weath but a simple man, who said to us, we will give you education, the rest of what you do with your life will take commitment, loyalty, passion, hard work, integity, morals and a really strong heart. So at that time, I knew that me graduation and sucess will also measure him as a father and I wanted him to know, that he was great dad. I graduated, excelled, and within the first three years – i flew, I was promoted 3 times….wow the look on parents face was priceless. It pure joy…an amazing gift that they have given that in some way I have given back. This was and remains a special moment.
Years progressed and my dad passed in 2004 – I was gutted!!!!
I think that i would have like him to see how much I progressed in life.
So comimg back to the title – We as women sacrfice family, holidays, sleepless nights to meet deadlines….but somehow my partner felt that if i earned a bigger salary then i was better – no i am not better than you and SO WHAT if earn a bigger salary!!!
But this is never the case, somehow in his mind, he felt that I was making him feel less than. I thought incredible…I was doing this for us, so we both have a better life. He felt i was too bossy and in turn i started to become more submissive, I gave him the bank, cards, credit cards – but this still did not work. I wondered if the responsibilty was too for him. But I kept quiet. I wanted my marriage to work so i became more submissive, made sure that our home was beautiful, he had every toy he can imagine, surfboards, paragliders, Kite surfer, bike….I good go on. Slowly over the years my self esteem fell apart…..i was spending weekends in bed….just wanting to be quiet, i just was done with conflict. It was all too exhausting and oneday a few weeks ago, he moved and asked me for a divorce. I agreed because i just did not know, what else i could to show him that loved him and was in love with him. He just wanted out, but i know that I wish him the very best luck. We were together for 10 years. We will remain friends. But it still bugs me-everytime I became a little more successful, he broke me down with words and I let him, My mom says that when you do too much for a man, he does not appreaciate it, it become something we meant to do for them. They do appreciate it, its a routine in their mind.
So have any of you had the same problem???? I love to hear your comments.
Love you till the end!